THINNER
Jack Choo
Directed by: Tom Holland
Written by: Tom Holland, Stephen King (novel; as Richard Bachman), Michael McDowell. Cast: Robert John Burke (Billy Halleck), Joe Mantegna (Richie Ginelli), Lucinda Jenney (Heidi Halleck), Kari Salin-Wuhrer (Gina Lempke)
Produced By: Spelling Films
Runtime: Approx. 92 minutes
Rating: * out of *****
More than 10 Stephen King stories have been translated into tv and screen versions. His greater works on screen includes THE SHINING, MISERY, CARRIE, DOLORES CLAIRBORNE and THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION, all of which won were critical and commercial success. O ther than that, there have been rather entertaining ones such as CUJO, CHRISTINE, SALEM'S LOT and PET SEMATERY. Some were underserving for film so, they went straight to either video or mini-series on TV (THE STAND, TOMMYKNOCKERS, IT, THE LANGOLIERS). I m ust admit, most of the TV ones were real duds. THINNER, a production of the new film production company by Aaron Spelling (the TV production mogul) is no exception. THINNER is not much more than a dull, monotonous and elongated version of a bad TALES FROM THE CRYPT or THE OUTER LIMITS episode.
A successful lawyer, Billy Halleck (Burke), has a great life; he is successful and has a great family. His only one BIG problem is that he is grossly overweight. While driving along in his hometown, he accidentally knocks down and kills an old gypsy lady. Now, being an influential lawyer and all, he is determined to get away with the incident unscathed, with the help from his friends, a local judge and the head of the local police department.
Out for justice, the father of the old gypsy lady places a curse onto Billy and his cohorts, each destined for a different doom. Unaware of the curse, Billy soon finds out that he is losing weight FAST. Happy at first, but getting increasingly worried aft er a few weeks when he finds that he still loses massive amounts of weight even though he stuffs himself constantly with food. Suspecting something amiss, he discovers that his other two friends have been cursed to a quicker demise than him. He learns abo ut the curse and sets out to look for the gypsy travellers to destroy the curse before he thins to his bones.
Robert Burke (from the TV ROBOCOP series) tries to act out of the acting ability required for ROBOCOP, well, sad to say, with little success. The makeup they pasted all over him to give him that `grossly fat` appearance is particularly fake looking, a far cry from the infinitely better makeup seen in THE NUTTY PROFESSOR. The level of gore and special effects is less than any single episode of the X-FILES shown on TV. Maybe Spelling to stick to television productions.
Go for a cup of cuppuccino or a nice meal somewhere or simply just save that $7++ instead.
The Flying Inkpot Rating System:
* Wait for the TV2 broadcast.
** A little creaky, but still better than staying at home with Gotcha!
*** Pretty good, bring a friend.
**** Amazing, potent stuff.
***** Perfection. See it twice.
Other film reviews by this writer can be obtained from the InkVault by doing a key word search with this writer's name.Other film reviews by other writers can also be obtained from the InkVault through key word searches.
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