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MY GRANDSON THE DOCTOR


Sherrie Lee
Also see "The Doctor is In by Pia Chew.

WATCHING IT `LIVE' -- AND STAYING ALIVE

Friday evening, I catch myself as part of the studio audience for TCS's fourth sitcom, My Grandson, The Doctor. Lots of equipment block the various compartments in which the scenes take place. The actors and crew are at the other end of the studio getting ready for the recording. On my side, the tiered seats are almost filled up. There are about thirty of us; families, couples and friends. We all sit there unexpectantly. The kids are probably the most excited ones. I spot someone wearing a colourful and happy-looking Donald Duck vest. With his 80s-styled curly hair, he almost looks like Victor Khoo. He is to be our MC for the rest of the recording.

"GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! WELCOME TO ...." I swear the volume of the mike is rigged, just to make sure there's some sign of life in a corner of Studio One. Throughout the recording, Steven Ngiam plays the clown, earnestly trying to win us over. I'm not sure about the rest of the folks around me, but I am put off, at least at the beginning. Friday evening, I mutter to myself, and there's this joker trying to whip up enthusiasm. The only thing that gets my attention is the box of munchies he dips his hand into after a correct answer.

After the cast is introduced, the opening sequence is next. We have been reminded to laugh as loudly as we can and I am hoping there is reason to. While there are some laughs from the audience, they are pathetic next to the loud guffaws we hear coming from the other end. It seems that the same person is bellowing after each punchline, or to be more exact, after each line that's supposed to be one. The scriptwriter, perhaps? I'm not sure whether our laughter will make a difference. I can't even hear myself laugh except for the occasional snicker now and then.

The huge and cumbersome cameras are blocking the view. Everyone resorts to the small Sony TV at the corner. Only then can all the angles be seen. After every take, the TV screens black out and it's over to Steven Ngiam for more torturous story-telling and let-us-all-laugh-together fun. There is no reconciliation between his over-amplified zeal and the non-responsive audience. Again, only the kids pick up his cues to spring forth and speak into the mike or cheer for the cast. The rest of us offer our polite applause.

Now there is this scene involving Jacintha, Michelle Goh and Susan Kwa which needs several takes. Jacintha misses a line or two and it's back to square one. Michelle and Susan have not quite got the timing perfect and it's that sequence again. Of course we don't laugh as much as the previous takes but there's that persistent loud confirmation of punchlines. Are we needed at all? Do we really offer the cast our support? It is now probably the fifth take and I'm reduced to staring at the TV screen, too numb for even a silent wry response.

Apart from the bloopers and the genuinely funny bits, the audience is subdued. Our MC is still at it and I become more sympathetic towards him. It has been two hours and the episode is probably slightly more than half done. But I am as tired as Susan Kwa who sits a few rows away from us, waiting for her scene. I get ready to leave. I tell myself I'll catch the rest of the show on TV when it's aired. Did I waste my time? Maybe, but at least I got my prize -- a box of Raspberry Tartlets.

Afterthought: The tartlets were quite yummy despite the November expiry date.



Sherrie Lee Cheng lives in a nudist commune and makes mushroom bracelets in her free time.

The Flying Inkpot Rating System:
* Wait for the TV2 broadcast.
** A little creaky, but still better than staying at home with Gotcha!
*** Pretty good, bring a friend.
**** Amazing, potent stuff.
***** Perfection. See it twice.

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